What Women Want
This is for all those semi-clueless men out there who have been scratching their heads for years. We recently did a poll of over 100 women to get the answer to this age-old question.Here are some of the responses, paraphrased in some cases for length. No mumbo jumbo or psychobabble, just straight talk from women:
· I chose what I wanted. I wanted a man who was willing to stand up to me WITHOUT getting to be a great big creep. I wanted a man who would not be a momma's boy. In short, I wanted a man who would not necessarily be perfect in any other way than perfect for me.
· If I had a perfect man, I would probably not be as happy as I am today. Perfection is boring, as it leads to snobbery. And snobbery is only fun when you can pull it off better than a snob. I live around a bunch of wanna-be snobs. They aren't any fun.
· Don't look for perfection. Look for somebody who you can get along with and who is willing to work on your relationship as hard as you are willing to.
· Humm... I'm thinking we'd like men to think more like women.
· We'd like them to ALLOW themselves to have emotions, and to ALLOW them to show. I'm not talking anger here.. We see enough of men's need to be 'superior' and 'macho', how about a little tenderness.
· How about some REAL Honesty instead of beating around the 'bush' or just trying to shove his dick into it.
· How about being a little 'needy' once in a while without all the whining and demands?
· How about ASKING for a hug, or some cuddling, instead of just expecting it when their woman sees they need it? Or for that matter, expecting her to notice that he does!
· How about GIVING a hug and some cuddling when their woman needs it instead of making her beg for or demand it?
· How about letting her Rant and Rave without him having to fix everything for her?
· How about talking to her about things SHE's interested in, instead of planting his ass in front of the football game and grunting for another beer?
· How about HIM bringing HER a cup of coffee before the clock goes off in the morning?
· How about HIM ironing HER Shirt for work?
· How about HIM getting up with the baby every 2 hours?
· How about HIM being the one to say I Love You first, and meaning it?
· How about HIM initiating the meaningful conversation?
· I guess I really DO want men to think more like women. At least, I'd like it better if they'd think with their 'higher' brain more often than their 'lower' one.
· My fondest wish is that every man would experience what Jim Carey did in the movie Liar Liar!, and spend a week not being able to LIE about ANYTHING. That would be SOOOO refreshing!
· I don't want the perfect man, just one that I can be comfortable with, who does accept me for who I am - flaws and bitchiness, too, and who adores and spoils me rotten (anyway).
· Patience is a virtue I most admire.
· Spontaneity and the ability to be a little irresponsible in fun ways is a major plus!
· Of course, there are the obligatory looks, charisma, and that something about you (a man) that's verbally indescribable and no woman alive can really explain.
· A man who can diplomatically put up with my shit without allowing me to walk all over him at the same time.
· No, I don't expect him to know (when I need help or am just letting off steam), and I have no problems saying Hey, I just need to vent so would you mind just listening? I don't need you to fix anything; I just need to let off steam like a man does when you come home after an exasperating day. Invariably I end up listening to a tirade of 'how to fix' its that makes me want to run screaming from the room.
· The REAL crux of the problem! All the crap his mother and the other women he's been with did to him keeps getting in the way of his being able to see the WHO of who I am. All he sees is what THEY did and no matter what I do, he compares me to them and reacts to me in the ways that he reacted to them, right, wrong or otherwise.
· It's OK for an intelligent guy to be confident in his sexuality, enough to even appear silly on TV (or in public) sometimes.
· Women like men who are creative (and inventive).
· Women like men who aren't afraid of getting dirty and speaking their mind openly, honestly and without extraneous bullshit.
How's that for straightforward? Doesn't seem too complicated to me. Why is it that we as men can't seem to get it right?
The commonalities to me seem to be; love, honesty, tenderness, attention, respect, confidence, and a little sensitivity. All of these things we can seem to give to our friends and family, why is it we can't seem to pull it off with our wives and girlfriends? Actually the why we don't isn't important in any case. If men want to have good relationships with women it seems we'd better think more about what they want and need from us. If not then we really have no excuse to complain about not getting what we want as men.